I Stand In Awe of You.

Do you ever have moments like that? Where the only thing you can do its simply stand in awe of God? Moments where you can’t decide if you should laugh or if you should cry? God blessed me with a day full of those moments last week, and it made we wonder; why shouldn’t every day be like that?

I was privileged enough to have spent the weekend with the journey team in Hickory, North Carolina. There we got to hangout with some totally awesome kids at a DNOW. DNOW’s are essentially church retreats where college students come in and spend the weekend with the kids and pour into their lives. This was my first experience with DNOW and I was very impressed with the whole thing. So anyway, the weekend went very well and God opened the door for many conversations and opportunities to talk about Him. The ride back home was going to be a daunting two and a half hour drive but I was with awesome, Jesus loving people so it was cool. What I was about to experience was one of those moments where I was about to be broken and simply in awe of God. We turned on some Hillsong and man, did Jesus move. Lets just say that we had church that day. There was not a dry eye in the car as we were able to worship our undefinable God together. There were burst of laughter and sessions of weeping as we sat through bumper to bumper traffic and journeyed down winding roads. Why can’t every day be like that? I was challenged and humbled, broken and rested all the same time.

After arriving back at home we thought that our great adventure was done for the day, and boy, were we wrong. We were hungry so, we decided to go to Wendy’s for a quick dinner. As we are in line waiting to place our order, we notice an elderly woman eating alone. The look on her face is one of great distress, hurt, and anguish. She looked as though she was trying to fight back a water fall of tears. A random lady approached her and asked her if she was okay, I assume, and this started the flow of tears. After she left we knew that we need to pray for her. We approached her and began to share Jesus with her and how much He loved her and that no matter what giants she was facing that He was going to be there right beside her through it all. She began to weep as she told us about her husband and how he was in hospice, about to die of cancer. My heart broke for her as the pain she was experiencing was so tangible. We were honored enough to pray for her and blessed to have her pray for us. Then as we sat with her and got to fellowship with her, a precious old man walked towards our table. He hobbled along with a cain and had snow white hair. His voice shook and He told us about how great God had been in His life. His testimony of goods goodness yet again brought us to tears. Jesus was in Wendy’s that day as another table full of elderly people joined in the conversation of the goodness of God with us. It was phenomenal. As the time for us to leave drew near we decided to ask this precious woman whom we were eating with if we could go and pray for her husband. She was delighted with this idea and quickly jotted down his name and room number. We prayed with her before we left and jetted to hospice down the road. So at this point were all thinking can this day get any better? The answer, was yes. We walk into hospice and were directed to this precious old man’s room. He was in poor condition and the palsy in his face made it difficult for him to talk. We all teared up as we prayed for him and that God would have His way in this situation. What was about to happen was something that I was totally un prepared for. He began to pray for us. Not that he would be healed but that God would have His way and that God would work in our lives. Yet again, in room ten, at hospice, I stood in awe of God. As we were about to leave he said, “I know that I will see you again, on this side, or the next.” This was a statement that couldn’t be truer. He knew that He was going to see His savior soon and what a joyous occasion that would be. 

As I lie in my bed that night, simply reflecting on the day and all that God had done in my life, I was challenged. Why wasn’t I living every day like this? Were there not hurting people every where? John 13:35 says, “ By this everyone will know you are my disciples, if you love one another.”I want my love for Jesus to be so great that it simply overflows and that I may life a life of worship. I don’t want moments like that day to be simply something that happens. I yearn to walk in the sprit and to be so sensitive to where God is leading me. There is no excuse for not having that worship time, and communion with God on a daily basis. God is really teaching me that I need to die to myself daily. That I need to place my desires subordinate and to learn how to walk in the spirit. This life that we are given is not our own. I want to do the very best I can with what God has given me so that through this pitiful mess of a person that I am, He might be glorified.

Ps. Sorry this was such a long one... God has just been rocking my world.

Freedom.

2^nd Corinthians 3:16, “ Where the spirit of the Lord is there is freedom.”

     Paul’s words in this scripture paint such a clear and pure picture of freedom.  Simply basking in Gods presence there lays great and powerful freedom.  At the moment I am at a lost for words as I try to explain the emotions I am feeling. I am humbled but yet Gods presence and freedom is almost too much for me to wrap my mind around. I just wish that everyone could experience the power of God and His majestic beauty.  Sometimes, actually all the time, I wish that I could just drop everything and bask in Gods presence day in and day out. I long to know the word and to become more like Jesus. I just want more of Him. 

     Last night was probably one of the most epic nights ever. Basically I am so blessed I don’t even know what to do with myself. It was about midnight and I had just taken my shower in preparation for bed when I received an unexpected text message. It was an invite from one of my best friends Ward, to go and worship. Two thoughts flashed through my head upon reading this. The first being, Worship God under the starts…ummm duh! The second being, wow, how blessed am I to be getting text messages like that. It was simply a beautiful worship experience as 13 college students gathered under the stars to worship the creator of the universe. It was such a humbling experience to bask in Gods presence among fellow believers.  An unplanned, random event, set aside to worship out God, was truly what I needed. Having my own quite time is one thing but to have that glorious community of believers is irreplaceable. I am simply overwhelmed by the greatness of the God that we serve. There was so much liberation and freedom in those moments that the rest that I received was so much better than any sleep that I may have missed out on. Simply following God and trusting Him to guide each step of the way is the best thing in the world. 

Reckless.

What would happen if we as Christians lived our lives with a "reckless abandonment" for God? What would happen if we had a reckless faith that abandoned all worldly things for the sake of the cross? What would happen if we simply placed our desires subordinate? In my opinion it’s so easy to wonder these questions but to actually live them out is another story. The real question should be WHY aren't we living our lives with reckless abandonment? WHY aren’t our desires subordinates? If we lived this way there would be no need to wonder what would happen. 1st Corinthians 9:19 says, "Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible." As Christ followers we are set apart. We have a different standard in which we are called to live by. In order to live recklessly for Christ and to love well, we need to learn how to selflessly serve. Not for our glory or credit by any means but so that God is glorified and so that many may come to know the greatness of our God. These lives are not our own; we need to follow in Jesus' footsteps and learn how to truly serve and place others before ourselves. In my life, I want servant hood to be second nature.

     The other day I was honored enough to witness an example of this selfless, unexpected servant hood. My friends and I went on an awesome “geo-cashing” adventure. “Geo-cashing” is basically the most awesome thing ever. You acquire a set of coordinates from the “geo-cashing” web site and basically go on a treasure hunt. Once you reach the location of the coordinates you hunt for a metal box. These glorious boxes are usually full of tiny trinkets and a log where you write your name stating that you found the treasure. Anyways, after a long night of geo-cashing hunger invaded all of our bellies. By this time it was about 1am. One of my friends suggested that we go to her house and get some food. I know for a fact that if I brought a bunch of random people to my house in the middle of the night my parents would not be pleased, but she insisted. When we arrived at her house her father warmly welcomed us inside. He insisted we help ourselves to whatever food we wanted. He offered to make us things and was beyond hospitable. While this act in itself was a blessing, his generosity had just begun. He offered to make us a bonfire and proceeded to heat up hot dogs for us to roast. As the night wore on this selfless man chose to go out of his way to make sure that we were satisfied completely. I was taken back by such generous hospitality. We had never met this man before but yet he chose to put us before himself and go out of his way to be hospitable.

This incident reminded me of the children in Ecuador who offer their last piece of bread to a stranger because they care more about others than themselves. I long to live inconveniently.  In today’s society, it’s reckless to live inconveniently. It is reckless to live like a servant and to love unselfishly. John 13:35 says, “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”